You’re Not Alone in This
Lately, I’ve found myself hesitating to call myself a Christian. I hate the sound of that! So, let me be absolutely clear about what that doesn’t mean: I believe Jesus is fully God. I believe His sinless life perfectly revealed God’s character. I believe His sacrificial death on the cross atoned for my sins. I believe His physical resurrection conquered death three days later. My faith in Jesus is rock solid. What frustrates me is what so many claim and do in His name.
I gave my life to Christ when I was 22, and I’ve been in relationship with Him ever since. Over the years, I’ve come to know and feel His love deeply. It’s the kind of love that changes you from the inside out, that teaches you grace, humility, and strength. As a Black woman over 50, I’ve walked long enough with God to know His heart is not one of exclusion, control, or fear.
Yet Christian Nationalism—a movement that often hides behind the language of ‘faith and family’ while spreading division and superiority, has made it difficult not to feel some kind of way about those who misrepresent Jesus in this way. We see how this manifests in the political arena with the current administration.
Maybe you feel this, too. Perhaps you’ve watched the news over the past few years or scrolled through social media and felt that quiet ache of disappointment—or even anger—in your spirit. There’s a painful disconnect between the Jesus you know and the ‘Christianity’ being proclaimed from certain platforms, political parties, and pulpits. If so, you’re not alone. Many of us are wrestling with this right now, trying to hold onto our faith while watching how their version of Christianity is weaponized in ways that break our hearts.
✨ Journal Prompt:
Make two columns: In one, write what you see Jesus do and say in Scripture. In the other, write what you see being done and said in His name today. Where’s the disconnect? How does that make you feel?
Every time we open our Bible is an opportunity to hear from God. Let Him show you who He really is. (John 10:30)
A Black Woman’s Perspective: What I’ve Lived and Learned
For me, this isn’t just a theological issue; it’s a lived experience.
I’ve seen the harm of Christian Nationalism up close, both in words and in systems that quietly reinforce the idea that people who look like me are less deserving of opportunity or grace.
Let me quickly and clearly add: we haven’t experienced a fraction of what our ancestors endured. They bore the whip. They were torn from their families. They gave their lives so this generation could breathe freer air. We should stand on their sacrifices with profound gratitude.
But Christian Nationalism, through the current administration, is working to turn back the clock. Policies that target immigrants, strip protections, roll back civil rights, dismantle education about our true history—all wrapped in the language of Christianity. It’s the same old playbook from hundreds of years ago, but with a new cover.
We’ve watched Christianity be historically used to justify policies and attitudes that harm marginalized communities while claiming to protect “traditional values.” I’ve seen the Bible twisted to support agendas that Jesus himself would never endorse.
This kind of Christianity doesn’t match the Jesus I know.
Yet, as women over 50, we carry a kind of wisdom that helps us discern truth from pretense. We’ve lived through enough to know that power and faith aren’t the same thing—and that love, not fear, is what truly transforms hearts.
✨ Journal Prompt:
Christianity has been historically used to justify harm—from slavery to segregation to policies that target marginalized communities today. Where do you see that pattern continuing? How can YOU be part of breaking it?
And through it all: How are you leaning on our sovereign God? We are not of this world, so how does that truth sustain you as you face injustices in the United States? (John 17:16)
The Disappointment of Misaligned Believers
What adds to the heartbreak is seeing believers, and sometimes even those who look like me, align with Christian Nationalism because it appears to uphold “biblical values.
But when those same movements ignore racism, injustice, and hypocrisy, something vital is lost. The Jesus I follow changed everything! He didn’t conquer death so we could align ourselves with power and privilege. He created the body of Christ—a united community of believers called to love without exception. That means we do not ignore the suffering of others for political gain or personal comfort. He calls us to see His image in every person, especially those the world has marginalized.
This is one of the hardest parts, isn’t it? When people choose a version of faith that excludes or harms. When family members or longtime friends embrace a Christianity that feels foreign to the Jesus we know. When people prioritize political power over the very people Jesus centered in His ministry—the poor, the marginalized, the forgotten, we all lose.
It’s okay to grieve that. It’s okay to feel confused or angry. Maybe we should call ourselves “Jesus followers” instead of “Christians” to distance ourselves from those who are Christian in name only. But then I remember: Jesus’ work spoke for itself. His life was His witness. And that’s how we need to operate today: by letting our love, our actions, our choices reveal who we truly follow. So yes, I’m still claiming the name Christian, even when others distort what it means.
✨ Journal Prompt:
Have you wrestled with calling yourself a Christian because of what others are doing in Jesus’ name? What keeps you holding onto the label—or what makes you want to let it go? Write through your tension. There’s no right answer, just honest processing.
The Call: Active Faith in Our Sovereign God
The most faithful thing I can do right now is refuse to let Christian Nationalist pundits’ claims that their version of Christianity is the real one trigger anxiety. They can have the political platforms. They can have the power plays. But God remains sovereign. Jesus remains faithful. And I can rest in that truth, even when everything around me feels scary and unstable.
That’s why I’m kneeling exactly where I’ve always knelt, at the feet of the Jesus, who welcomed the outcast, who challenged the religious elite, who said ‘blessed are the peacemakers’ (Matthew 5:9) and ‘love your enemies’ (Matthew 5:44) and ‘whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me’ (Matthew 25:40).
‘God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble’ (Psalm 46:1). There is no other help I know. And when I feel overwhelmed by what’s being done in His name, I can rest in this: He’s got this. My job isn’t to fix anything; it’s to trust Him and follow Jesus faithfully.
So friend, this is our call right now: to actively lean on God. To pray, not as a last resort, but as our first response. And to trust His promises, not passively hoping things work out, but actively believing that our sovereign God is faithful. Prayer and trust are not passive acts, sisters. They are acts of faith. They are acts of resistance against fear and despair. The body of Christ must look to Jesus to be our strength and our King. That’s not weakness. That’s where our power comes from!
In Part 2, let’s go back to the beginning. Back to Jesus. Back to what Christianity was always supposed to be.
What’s Next
If you’re feeling the weight of this disconnect—if you’re tired of seeing Jesus misrepresented and love weaponized—I see you. You’re not alone in this struggle.
Next week, in Part 2, we’re going back to the source. Back to the Gospels. Back to what Jesus actually said, how He actually lived, and who He actually welcomed to His table. We’ll rediscover what Christianity was always supposed to be—before it got tangled up with nationalism, power, and fear.
The Jesus we know is still the same. His call hasn’t changed. And together, we’re reclaiming what it means to follow Him.
✨ Journal Prompt:
Before we move to Part 2, think about everything going on politically in this country today, and ask yourself, what would it look like for ME to actively lean on God this week, not passively hope, but actively trust? Write down one specific way you’ll practice active faith through prayer, through believing His promises, or through choosing His truth over fear.
Before You Go
I’d love to hear from you: How are you navigating this tension between the Jesus you know and the Christianity you see? What’s helping you stay anchored? Your voice matters here, and other women need to hear your story.
Share in the comments—your story might be exactly what another woman needs to hear today.
Journal with all of the prompts above — Take some this week to write honestly. Let God meet you in the process.
If this post resonated with you, please share it. There are women in your life who feel this same struggle and need to know they’re not alone.
Always remember: You’re not alone in this. We’re walking this faith journey together. 💜
Life is a faith journey. Walk boldly.
Be brave enough to pursue your dreams. Be faithful enough to trust the process. Be kind enough to help another woman along the way.
