“Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” – Philippians 2:4 (AMP)
Eight Days In: When Life Had Other Plans
In Part 1 of this blog series, I laid out my plan for Determined December. I talked about my keys on the keychain: Consistency, Determination, Grace, and Positivity. I shared my goals—tracking macros, strength training, walking 2-3 times a week, and lowering my A1C. I was ready. I was determined.
And then December actually started.
Here’s the truth about the first eight days of this month: I’ve worked out minimally. I’ve had no real dedicated workout time. I haven’t gotten in a single walk on the nature trail, not one. I’ve been tracking my protein and carbs better—on some days, all my meals; on others, at least breakfast. I’ve been able to stick to not eating after 6 pm, although sometimes it ended up being 7 or 7:30 pm.
On paper, it looks like I’m failing. In my head, I’ve battled the voice that says, “Girl, you’re just making excuses.”
But sometimes the plan for your life looks different than the plan for your health goals. And when that happens, grace isn’t optional; it’s essential.
The Sacred Work of Caregiving
My Mom went out of town for three weeks. She didn’t know it at first, but she needed this trip desperately. My youngest brother lives out of town, and she doesn’t get to see him nearly enough. More than that, we wanted her to be taken care of for a change. My mother has always been a caretaker. Always. And honestly, I wish she could have stayed six weeks instead of three.
But the thing is: my 93-year-old grandmother wasn’t doing well before my mother left. Granny’s health has been declining over the past month or so, and we all knew it. When Mom was preparing to leave, she was debating whether she should stay or go.
My grandmother, with all the wisdom and clarity that 93 years can bring, told her: “Go. Have a good time. If I’m going to die, I’m going to die. You staying here won’t change that.”
So Mom went. And I wanted to help her have some peace of mind while she was away.
Every day for those three weeks, I went to the nursing home to spend time with Granny. Sometimes I bought food and brought it, or I prepared a little something for her to eat, even though she eats very little now. I sat with her. I wanted to make sure she knew she’s not alone. I wanted to make sure she knew she was loved and cherished.
I also checked on my mom’s house daily—making sure everything was secure and handling anything that needed attention. I cleaned carpets. I took care of the little and big things so that when my mother returned home, she could just take it easy and recuperate from her flight home.
This wasn’t about me being a good daughter and granddaughter (though I hope I am). This was about making sure my mother, who has given her whole life to taking care of us, could have three weeks of peace. Three weeks where she didn’t have to worry (too much) about what’s happening at home. Three weeks where she could be the one being cared for.
That matters more than any workout or walk I missed.
The Guilt vs. Grace Battle
You know, here’s where it gets messy: even knowing all of that, I still felt guilty.
I felt guilty every time I thought about working out and didn’t. I felt guilty when Monday came—the one sunny day (that wasn’t windy) last week, the one perfect day (although it was cold) for a walk—and I spent it cleaning carpets instead.
The voice in my head said: You’re making excuses. If you really wanted this, you’d make it happen. Other people manage to work out and take care of their responsibilities. What’s up with you?
And I had to fight back with the truth.
The truth is: I wasn’t making excuses. I made choices. I chose to prioritize my grandmother’s well-being and my mother’s peace of mind. I chose to be present in a season that may be my Granny’s last. I chose to steward not just my body, but my family.
Giving yourself grace isn’t about lowering the bar. It’s about recognizing that the bar might look different in different seasons.
There’s a big difference between quitting and adapting. There’s a difference between giving up and permitting yourself to be human.
I needed to remind myself of that. Maybe you do too.
When Winter Changes Everything
There’s one more layer of reality to these eight days I forgot to mention: we had our first bout of winter weather of this season (light snow) last week.
Suddenly, the days aren’t just shorter (dark before 5 pm)—they’re colder. Windier. The nature trail I love is not quite as inviting when it’s cold and windy. And honestly, I like to do my walks with no time restraints. I want to feel free in that way. If I can’t have it that way, I don’t want to walk at all. The days being shorter is, in a way, a time constraint when I have other important plans for that day.
I know that sounds rigid; maybe it is, but walking outside has become essential for my mental health. It’s not just exercise for me, it’s therapy. It’s where I process. It’s where I breathe. Walking under the trees on the nature trail is one of the places where I hear God most clearly.
But winter doesn’t care about my preferences. And a packed caregiving schedule doesn’t bend to accommodate my ideal walking conditions.
So I’m left with a choice: adapt or abandon the goal entirely—and I don’t intend on abandoning the goal!
Small Wins ARE Enough
During these first eight days of December, I’ve tracked my protein and carbs more consistently. Some days, I tracked all my meals. Other days, I at least got breakfast tracked. That’s progress.
In Part 1, I shared how lowering my A1C is deeply important to me. That goal hasn’t changed. I’ve been working on tightening my eating window. I ideally want to start eating around 9 am and stop by 6 pm to keep insulin lower overnight, which directly impacts my A1C. Unfortunately, I don’t sleep great most nights (I sleep okay), so I’m not making it to the kitchen until 10:30 am most days. And the 6 pm cutoff? Some of those days, I was still at the nursing home with Granny or handling things at my mother’s house, and I didn’t even get home until 6 pm or later. How do you stop eating by 6 pm when you’re not even home yet? So yes, some nights it was 7 or 7:30 pm before I finished eating. But that’s still progress from my previous 8 pm pattern, and I’m doing the best I can with the season I’m in.
I’ve shown up for my grandmother every single day. I’ve protected my mother’s peace. I’ve handled responsibilities that needed handling.
Are these the wins I planned for in Part 1? No.
Are they still wins? Absolutely.
In a season where I have a lot going on, tracking even one meal is a victory. Hitting my protein goal at breakfast is a win. Showing up for my family while not completely abandoning my health goals? That’s not failure. That’s faithfulness in a different form.
Sometimes, small wins are enough. Sometimes, they have to be.
When the Plan Needs a Pivot: Flexibility as Faith in Action
I’m realizing: pivoting must ALWAYS be part of the plan.
Determination without flexibility just makes no sense. And it would be counterproductive and stressful.
I would really like to get myself a walking pad or a treadmill. I need a way to get my walks in at home when the weather doesn’t cooperate, when the days are too short, or when my schedule is too packed to drive to the trail.
Now, will walking inside on a pad give me the same mental health boost as walking outside in nature? Honestly, I don’t know. I’m skeptical. There’s something about being outside in the fresh air, under the trees on the trail, that feeds my soul in a way I’m not sure an indoor walk can replicate.
But I’m definitely willing to try.
The willingness to pivot is faith in action. It’s trusting that God can meet me on a walking pad just as much as He meets me on a nature trail. It’s believing that adapting my plan doesn’t mean abandoning my goals.
Being flexible when plans change isn’t a weakness. The ability to be flexible is the ultimate flex-it’s wisdom.
lex—it’s wisdom.
The women who make it through hard seasons aren’t the ones with perfect plans. They’re the ones who know when and how to pivot. They’re the ones who can say, “This isn’t working right now, so what else can I try?”
Determined December isn’t about executing a perfect plan. It’s about staying determined even when the plan has to shift or change.
The Trust Factor
“But as for me, I trust [confidently] in You and Your greatness, O Lord, I said, ‘You are my God.” I trust in you, Lord; I say, ‘You are my God.’ My times are in your hands…” – Psalm 31:14, 15
At the end of the day, this is what I keep coming back to: my times are in God’s hands. The Lord orders my steps. (Proverbs 16:9)
The timing of my health goals? In His hands.
The timing of my mother’s rest? In His hands.
The timing of my grandmother’s remaining days? In His hands.
The timing of when I’ll finally see that A1C drop to 5.0? In His hands.
I can plan. I can set goals. I can be determined. But I can’t control everything. And honestly? I don’t want to. Because the God who holds my times is far more trustworthy than my best-laid plans. (Proverbs 19:21)
This doesn’t mean I give up. It means I surrender the outcome to the Lord while staying faithful to the process—whatever that process looks like in this season.
Reflection Questions
Take a moment to journal on these:
- What responsibilities are you carrying right now that require you to pivot your own goals? How can you honor both your responsibilities and your needs?
- Where do you need to give yourself grace this week? What would it look like to truly extend that grace instead of just talking about it?
- What’s one small win you can celebrate today? (And I mean TODAY—not last week, not eventually. Right now, what’s one thing you did well?)
- What does flexibility look like in your current season? Where might you be holding too rigidly to a plan that needs to shift?
- Who are you looking to the interests of right now? How is that impacting your own goals, and is that a sacrifice worth making?
Walk With Me
If you’re in a season where you’re doing “all the right things,” but life keeps happening. Or, if you’re torn between caring for others and caring for yourself and wondering whether your small wins even count, I want you to hear this:
You’re not failing. You’re faithful.
You’re faithful to your family and to your responsibilities. You can also be faithful to yourself, even if that looks different than you planned.
Determined December continues. Not perfectly. Not according to the original plan. But with grace and flexibility, trusting that God sees every small win, every sacrifice, every moment we choose to look not only to our own interests but to the interests of others.
This is still a long journey. One month won’t fix everything. But one month of showing up—even imperfectly—matters.
Keep walking with me. Let’s choose health, stewardship, and grace over perfection. Let’s pivot when we need to. Let’s celebrate the small wins. And let’s trust that our times—all of them—are in His hands.
Our best years are not behind us. They’re unfolding right in front of us—right now.
Life is a faith journey. Walk boldly—even when you have to walk differently than you planned.
Be brave enough to pursue your dreams. 💜
Be faithful enough to trust the process. 💜
Be kind enough to help another woman along the way. 💜
